Jimmy Carter, Caitlyn Jenner, and the Eternal Tragedy of the Atlanta Falcons

Ah, the Atlanta Falcons.

A whole franchise of heartbreak wrapped in red and black.

But before I share my petty soliloquy about Dem Birds…

Let’s talk about a great man from Georgia.

Jimmy Carter — a man who lived a life so full of irony, it deserves its own Hulu series.

This man saw it all.

He watched Bruce Jenner sprint to Olympic gold, become the male athlete of the year, and then decades later, reemerge as Caitlyn Jenner to win woman of the year.

The full circle of gender bending, boundary breaking excellence.

And you know what else is a circle?

A ring.

You know who ain’t got one?

The Falcons.

Of all the things Jimmy witnessed in his life… he has never seen the Falcons win a Super Bowl.

He beat cancer, built houses in his 90s, and negotiated peace treaties like they were Bottomless Mimosa Sunday brunch plans.

He’s survived wars, recessions, rotary phones, and twerking, and TikTok…

But ATL?

28–3.

That’s their whole story.

Not a legacy.

Not a dynasty.

But — a meme.

They are nothing more than a punchline in group chats and in sports history.

Jimmy lived long enough to see humanity land on the moon, a Black President, a reality show President and Diddy.

But his hometown team?

Never quite made it four quarters ahead of their opponents when it counted.

It’s rumored that in his last week he only wanted to see the Falcons make it to the playoffs.

Well Jimmy, wherever you are, sorry buddy.

You might have won a Nobel Peace Prize, but the Falcons?

They ain’t never, ever, ever-ever-ever gonna win a thing.

Definitely not a ring.

That’s both hilarious.

And so Atlanta.

Atl Hoe.

And if you need a shoulder to cry on.

We listen but we don’t judge.

#whodat